- "I'll kiss your dumb lips."
- — Flaca to Maritza
Aleida, Gloria, Daya, Flaca, and Maritza are all playing dominos in the yard. Gloria notices Red and Piper searching for something in the field and asks what they are doing. Flaca informs her that Red is looking for the chicken once again. Gloria wonders what's so special about the chicken, but Maritza wonders maybe it's not the chicken, but what's within the chicken. She tells them about her old friend "Potato Chip" who used to bring in dope by placing it inside birds. Flaca asks if they stuck it up the butt and Maritza says they put it in a baggie and shoved it down the birds throat, but maybe the butt too. Aleida claims there is no chicken, but Maritza ignores her and states that it could be worth up to one thousand dollars. She and Flaca abandon their game and go off to search for the chicken. ("The Chickening")
Flaca and Maritza are playing dominos and listening to music while in the TV Room. Flaca changes the station and complains that none of the stations play The Smiths. Maritza calls The Smiths pussy music, and Flaca retorts that "How Soon Is Now?" is an 80's anthem. Maritza reminds her she was born in 1992, and that she doesn't know shit. They get into a heated argument, as do many other inmates, as Healy enters. Flaca and Maritza blame one another and Healy announces he is bringing back the Woman's Advisory Council.
Maritza plans to take the council role and represent the Hispanics and Latinas. She states her slogan as "If you want more pizza, vote for Maritza." She believes it will get her more voters since everyone likes pizza, calling it American. Flaca corrects her, telling her it is an Italian food, and calls her an idiot in the process. Maritza asks if she has anything better and Flaca tells her she is also running. Maritza mocks her and says she slogan will be "Vote for Flaca, puta's full of caca". Flaca goes to hit Maritza before being stopped by Aleida.
Suzanne, Poussey, Cindy, Flaca, and Maritza have all volunteered to participate in the scared straight program to prevent young delinquents from ending up in prison. Bell orders them to simmer down and reminds them that the point of the program is to prevent the kids from making the same mistakes they did. Flaca asks if she can make them cry and high fives Maritza when Bell gives them permission to do so. ("Bora Bora Bora")
Flaca, Gloria, and Maritza come to bring food at Tricia's memorial gathering. Flaca says though she did not know Tricia well, but she always got a good vibe from her. Maritza comments that it sucks she hung herself. ("Tall Men with Feelings")
Maritza and Flaca show off their rather erotic dancing skills during the Christmas Pageant auditions.
Daya, Maritza, Maria, and Flaca are in the kitchen making tamales. Daya mentions how much it feels like Christmas at home, and Flaca comments in Spanish that it does, though her uncle Fernando is not around to stick his hands down her pants. Daya requests for her to speak in English. Maria says the pervert in her family is her cousin Frankie, who her mother hit with a brick. Maritza says her daughter is with her cousin at a marimacha collective she is apart of. Flaca asks if she's worried that her surroundings might turn her daughter gay, but Maritza says she is only a baby and she has one year left on her sentence.
Flaca and Maritza teach Daya a dance in the kitchen and Bennett orders for them to get to work. Flaca tells him to lighten up, but Bennett only repeats his order. The duo walks away as Flaca mutters that Daya needs to tell her boyfriend to lighten up in Spanish. Daya becomes defensive and informs Flaca she understands some Spanish, and that Bennett is not her boyfriend. This only annoys Bennett further and Flaca and Maritza giggle at what they have started.
Maritza and Flaca are in the crowd watching the Christmas Pageant. Flaca makes a sexual innuendo which causes the crowd to erupt in laughter. Bell tells them to knock it off. Maritza whispers to Flaca that it should've been them up there and Flaca quietly agrees. ("Can't Fix Crazy")
Maria and Maritza are in the kitchen, complaining about how Flaca gets to attend the job fair while they stay back and work. Gloria reminds them it's because Flaca asks first, and that if they all went, no one would be in the kitchen. Maritza believes Flaca does not even need job fair since her boyfriend is the supposed "King of Molly". ("Looks Blue, Tastes Red")
After the Christmas Pageant, Maritza and Flaca run into Suzanne during one of her episodes. Suzanne tells them she felt Jesus' presence during the performance, and Flaca mockingly asks if she felt his presence, or pee running down her leg. Maritza tells Suzanne how pathetic it was that the mute had to save her, since after she was unable to sing her solo, Norma of all people had to swoop in and save the day. The continue to taunt her as she walks away. ("Hugs Can Be Deceiving")
Maritza tells Flaca of the man (possibly a relative or an ex-boyfriend) who is currently watching over her baby. She claims that he has no idea how to take care of himself, saying he used to condition, and then shampoo. Flaca defends him, guessing that maybe no one taught him. Maritza says he is still a dumbass, and wonders how she was able to leave her baby with someone like that. She talks about how bad she feels for missing her daughters first birthday, just as Gloria walks in. Flaca hurries to clear a shower stall for Gloria, but as soon as Gloria enters the stall, something bubbles up from the drain and each of the shower stall floors are covered in feces. ("Low Self Esteem City")
Maritza tells the kitchen staff of a Valentine's Day date she had with a Wall Street guy who flew her in a helicopter to D.C. Flaca asks her if she's serious, and Maritza claims Valentine's Day makes guys go crazy since they love it so much. Flaca is upset because her boyfriend Ian has not visited in a while. She thinks it would be nice if he showed up, but he only has a Vespa and it is too cold to ride far.
The kitchen staff makes cookies in honor of the Valentine's party. Maritza asks Flaca what her cookie says. Flaca tells her it's for Ian, just in case he shows up.
Piper asks the two girls how they would define love for prison newsletter. Flaca describes it as getting into a warm bath filled with chocolate pudding and The Smiths playing in the background, with warm light all over and five guys massaging you. Maritza chimes in that you also have a pizza, and Flaca agrees.
Flaca inquires some toilet hooch from a "Greek chick with a beard". She shares it with Maritza, who thinks it tastes pretty good.
Blanca, Flaca, and Maritza all confront Bennett during the party. They each blackmail him and ask for him to bring them in special items. Flaca requests an iPod shuffle, Blanca requests a cell phone with a camera, and Maritza requests a Yoo-hoo and an act flouride rinse for her teeth.In the darkened kitchen, Maritza complains to Flaca that they're wasting the best years of their life in prison, and that no one is there to kiss her while she's at her best. Flaca offers to kiss her, and they proceed to. Shortly after, they unanimously decide that it was silly and they laugh it off as mere friends.
Maritza tells Flaca that she is so excited she is to finally see her child again, she might not be able to fall asleep. Flaca tells her that letting her child see her with bags under her eyes is setting a bad example. ("Mother's Day")
Flaca is infected with bed bugs, which eventually spreads onto the other Spanish girls. Maritza asks if she has shampoo, but Flaca says bed bugs do not live on you, but your sheets and clothes, which they all have to wash now. Maritza realizes Flaca has infected her with bed bugs as well. Daya and Aleida pass by and asks what's going on, and Maritza tells her that Flaca has scabes. Gloria orders for everyone to start stripping the beds. ("Bed Bugs and Beyond")
Flaca and Maritza encourage Daya to start planning her wedding, after hearing about her engagement with Bennett. Maria expresses her love for wedding parties, and Maria interjects, asking what makes Maritza think that Daya even wants her there. She gives a serious speech about how they are all only friends because they are in prison, but is ultimately ignored when Flaca continues the conversation. Flaca thinks a summer wedding would be nice, but takes it back when she realizes she won't be getting out until next fall. ("Empathy Is a Boner Killer")
Upset at Bennett's sudden departure, Daya angrily serves people their breakfast. Maritza asks Flaca if Bennett had sex with Aleida after Daya calls him a motherfucker. Flaca says no and playfully calls her an idiot, but Maritza doesn't think it's that crazy of a question. Flaca says the eggs they are serving smell like ass and Maritza jokes that Gloria must have used her fart seasoning. Daya calls them children and storms off.
During a prison inspection, Caputo gives the SVPs a tour of the kitchen. Caputo asks Gloria what's on the menu, to which she bluntly replies "food". Flaca tells them it's a "Cuban garbanzo bean stew-type thingy" that they got a whole case of last week, after Gloria found a way to stretch them after they picked out the rotten ones. Caputo refers to the inmates as the prisons best assets who are relied on to get through the day. Maritza recalls one time everyone got diarrhea and they served white bread for the next couple days. As soon as Caputo and the SVPs exit the room, Gloria scolds at the girls and asks when they will ever learn to shut up, calling them Lucy and Ethel without the charm. Flaca claims they were only trying to help, but Gloria says if she truly wants to help, then she should stop thinking anyone needs them to do more than their jobs, and storms off. Flaca asks Maritza if she has her period, which she replies yes. Flaca says she has hers too and Maritza remarks that it all makes sense now. ("Finger in the Dyke")
The kitchen staff discuss what they think the new job may be. Blanca says some prisons have jobs where you can learn to fight fires. Maritza tells Flaca she wouldn't mind handling a big hose. Daya says she heard it's a call center. Flaca believes that with her sexy voice, she'll make a lot of commissions. Gloria tells them that none of them are applying for the new job, and Maritza sends Flaca a knowing look.
Flaca thinks whatever the new job is, it will take skills and smarts. Maria asks what Flaca will wow them with, her eyeliner skills or her knowledge of how many words rhyme with bleak in emo music. Flaca tells Maria she didn't take her baby away, and Maria advises Flaca to shut up about shit she doesn't know about. This nearly leads to a physical altercation, but Maritza and Gloria break it apart. Gloria orders Flaca to go scrub pans and Flaca announces that she is "so done with this depressing ass place".In their cell block, Flaca tells Maritza she is applying for the new job. Maritza says that Gloria is right, it's better with them all together. She worries they might replace Flaca with someone who's mean or likes Coldplay. Flaca tells Maritza she's better than that, and when she wears her apron in the kitchen, she's really wearing it ironically.
Flaca arrives to the kitchen and tells the staff she got the job. She adds that she's better than all of them and calls them all nobodies. Maritza appears sad and goes back to work. ("Fake It Till You Fake It Some More")
Piper has a discussion about the terms and conditions of her panty business with Flaca, Maria, and Maritza. Flaca tells Piper how happy she is making her ass, stating the soggy prison panties have been depressing her cheeks. Maritza agrees, saying she needs to turn down her booty frown. Maria wonders what makes Piper think they won't turn her in, just as Stella walks over and makes it known they will pay them for it. Flaca asks Piper if she's been stealing the panties from work, and Piper affirms she is not stealing, only appropriating unused materials. Flaca remarks she should of thought of it first. Maritza tells Flaca they can be panty twinsies, like old times. They both tell Piper they are in and walk off, Maria following shortly after.
At lunch, Maritza asks Flaca if she has her panties on. Flaca says she does and that she feels sexy under her khakis now. Maria teasingly asks Flaca who she feels sexy for, claiming it is for O'Neill. Flaca just gives her the finger. Flaca tells Maritza she feels like she has a secret, like they're apart of a secret club that no one knows about, and she feels cool. Maritza jokes that after she said that, her nipples got super hard. Flaca gets her lunch and she and Maritza exchange goodbyes. Maritza sadly watches Flaca walk off and goes back to her job. ("A Tittin' and a Hairin'")
Maritza briefly sits with Flaca at lunch. Piper walks over and Flaca tells her they don't work for Ramen noodles anymore, they want a fair amount of pay. She looks over to Maritza for support, who agrees and returns to her job. ("We Can Be Heroes")
Maritza complains to Flaca that she can't wait for Daya to deliver her baby so that she can stop being pregnant. Flaca tells her to have some compassion, reminding her that she too was pregnant once. Maritza says it wasn't a big deal, and she didn't know she was pregnant until seven months in. Flaca incredulously asks how Maritza didn't know, saying since she weighs about ninety pounds, she must've looked like an egg with four sticks in it. Maritza tells Flaca she is not a scientist, and that she was smoking a lot of pot that summer. Maritza adjusts her thong, and Flaca appears upset, since Piper fired her from the used panty business for rebelling against her. ("Don't Make Me Come Back There")
In the lake, Maria and Maritza interrupt Flaca and Gloria's reconciliation by splashing water on them. ("Trust No Bitch")